Are You Suffering from Tomorrowness?
“We took such care of tomorrow, but died on the way there.”
― Warsan Shire
We live our lives thinking about what will happen tomorrow, and we don’t take care of ourselves today.
We don’t have time now, but we fool ourselves thinking that everything will be different in the day to come.
You are living a fantasy believing you will finish tomorrow, what you haven’t even started yet.
Stop postponing your life until tomorrow.
Don’t let others steal your today. Don’t make other people’s priorities, yours. Don’t let busyness and your everyday routine, postpone your dreams.
Reconnect to who you are, to what’s important to you, and who you want to be.
Stop waiting for tomorrow. Build the life that you want starting today.
Remember Kahlil Gibran words: “The timeless in you is aware of life’s timelessness. And knows that yesterday is but today’s memory and tomorrow is today’s dream.”
Why You Can’t Be Present Today
“To rush into explanations is always a sign of weakness.”
― Agatha Christie
You are your excuses.
Your excuses don’t just limit your dreams. They define who you become. What you say no to defines who you are, as I wrote here.
When your choices are delineated by excuses, you are saying no to living the life you want.
There’s one answer I can’t stand from people: “I couldn’t do it.” It feels like lack of ownership. I prefer someone saying “I didn’t want to do it” (a choice), or “I prioritized other stuff instead” (another choice).
When you make excuses, you lose control of your actions.
Excuses are explanations for your failure. Or, even worse, excuses are a gracious way for you to say that you didn’t even try.
You can’t live in the present when you are busy making excuses for what happened (or not) in the past.
Are you living the life that you want?
“Change happens for you the moment you want something
more than you fear it.”
― Eric Micha’el Leventhal
“Live the life of your dreams they tell you.” But that sounds like a paradox. If you are dreaming, you are not living.
The reason why most people don’t get to live the life they wish is that they can jump into action. They dream, they talked a lot, complain even more but do nothing to make things happen.
When we judge ourselves we hurt our performance. Overthinking stimulates your fight-or-flight response. Negative thoughts diminishes your cognitive processes. Thus, affecting your perception, learning and reasoning abilities.
If babies were judgmental, none us would have learned to walk.
When you ask a kid to draw, they jump right into. Adults, on the contrary, get paralyzed. “I don’t know.” — they say and hold the pencil in their hands like if it was the end of the world.
When we think, we doubt ourselves. When we judge our abilities, not knowing something becomes a barrier. It’s actually not understanding what drives exploration and experimentation. That’s how you get to achieve what you want.
Doing what you love requires courage.
People will say you are crazy when you follow your passion. Others will try to stop you when you are about to take the leap. Not because they want to protect you. It’s their own cowardice that they want to hide.
When you are acting brave, you become every coward’s mirror.
I’m not judging here. But take every person you admire in life. Think about successful artists, leaders, innovators, teachers, or family members. What do they have in common? They know what they want.
Clarity drives action in life.
When you know what you really want, you become unstoppable.
Understanding what you want most in life is your beacon. Your life purpose is the lighthouse that will keep you safe especially during stormy weather.
Your purpose in life will set you free, as I wrote here.
Decide What You Want Most in Life
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.”
― H. Jackson Brown Jr.
Your success is not defined by what you achieved, but the legacy you leave behind. The impact of your actions is what makes your behavior worthy.
Living the life you want is not a motto. You can design and build your life purposefully. Here’s the model I use in many of our workshops to help participants clarify what they want most in life.
There are three key elements:
- Your purpose: Your Why. What drives. What makes you enjoy what you do regardless of the difficulty. It gives clarity to your actions and choices.
- What you do: All the activities you perform (routines, work, hobbies, roles you play, etc.).
- Your achievements: The result of your actions. It doesn’t matter how driven you are or how much you do. The impact you create becomes your measure of personal success.
When what you do is aligned with your purpose, it drives personal fulfillment.
When what you do creates a positive impact, that gives you the motivation to continue doing it or to do it more often or improve your craft.
When what you achieve is aligned with your purpose it makes you feel good. Happiness is wanting what you get, as per Dale Carnegie. It means that you are grateful for your achievements.
The life you want lies at the intersection of your purpose, what you do, and what you achieve.
This is not a perfect diagram thought. Life is not.
It’s just a simple representation that your life is a system. When those three elements play together, it’s because you are heading in the right direction.
But, first, you have to cross the line.
The Point of No Return
“Beyond a certain point, there is no return. This point has to be reached.”
― Franz Kafka
Your life is out of your control. Realizing that will make you free. Especially from the perfectionist syndrome.
You cannot either control external events nor other people. But you can control your choices. That’s how you build your life. What you choose to accept, change, celebrate, let go, overcome, and ignore.
Your decisions will get you closer (or not) to accomplish what you want the most in life.
All your plans will be put to the test. And most of them will fail. And that’s OK. The only projects that succeed are those where improvisation and adaptation play a critical role. Generals lose battles when they are making decisions miles away from where the action is happening.
Don’t make the same mistake. Don’t plan your life from the comfort of your couch or bed. Fight the battles on the ground. Get your hands dirty. Be at the forefront of where the action is happening, instead of watching it on your device of preference.
Spanish conquistador Hernán Cortéz was on a mission when he landed in Veracruz back in 1519. His commitment to conquer Mexico was such that retreat was not an option. That’s why he ordered his men to burn all the ships.
The only way to keep everyone from quitting was to take their transportation back to Spain off the table.
Cross the line. Burn the ships.
The moment there’s no way back, that’s when you start building your way forward.
The succeed or die approach allowed Cortés to achieve what no Spanish conquistador thought possible. He accomplished what he wanted the most.
The point of no return is when your purpose and what you do align to help you achieve what you want.
Become the Architect of Your Life
“You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us. And the world will live as one.”
― John Lennon
Change happens from within.
No one but you can decide what is it that you want the most. No one else is better suited than yourself to design, build, and enjoy the life that you want.
Decide what you want most in life and cross the point of no return:
- Be in charge of your life (don’t let excuses define your choices).
- Become successful (on your own terms).
- Become unrecognizable (but stay authentic).
- Become who you want to be (not what others expect from you).
- Become unstoppable (trust your instincts, not your fears).
- Become who you can be (and who you want to be).
- Become the best version of yourself (not what your thoughts tell you).
Stop postponing your life until tomorrow. Start today.